BookRix

very impressive title :)

didnt read

very interesting story,voted

Not to say I didn't like it. I did. your writing style is neat. We all have a differnt way of seeing things as writers and we are all writers. someone told me once that to be called a writer you have to have sold a story. I don't believe that. I believe that once you pick up pen and paper you become a writer. For you are telling a story that means something to you and someday to someone else. Good luck. May all our stories mean something to someone else.

Hi Miguel,

What an interesting story. I'm sure I read it before in the past, did you have it entered into the 'Family stories' contest?

I noticed some tense issues, which doesn't take much of a clean up, just a re read, Mum'll have to do that for you I suppose. Also, maybe check the usage of 'he', might want to look at mixing it up with his name in some area's and move around sentences in other.

Good luck with the contest.

Bek

Thanks everyone for voting!

:)

nice fiction ,your dominant style is analytical,you like to get to the bottom of things ...you got my vote..

Thanks Pochsp for stop & read! :)

Thanks szirra so much!