BookRix

I liked this tale of mystique and subtle romance. To be able to time travel is a dream of many, I'd say. This is a classy story, with a film noir feel and it holds great promise. I hope you will continue this enchanting book, Laz. It is off to a tantalizing start.

And.....

Please continue this titillating tale.

Sincerely,
Willie

It's great so far. Please, write on!

My, I never thought of it like that, I should re-read it and see...lol

that the pretty side of lust...please continue...Paula

So far so good looking forward to the next chapter

Hi Laz,

Love your cover art, did you do this?

Your adjectives required hyphens. Your commas need work, too.

Not sure about the 'short for Leopold' comment.

You have a lyricism to your writing.

I'd go with more contractions in your dialogue. This'll make it more natural.

pg 7: tense error about the one bedroom apartment, it 'is' humble but neat. 'is' should be 'was'.

I like your beginning, though it hasn't opened into anything yet, but 'oh' the possibilities. Looking forward to more.

Bek :)

I like it your writing is very smooth you should continue.

I think it would be a good idea to make it romantic and not x-rated.
Liz

Hi Paula and Val...( and Pat, my buddy)I took your advice and re-wrote it in the past tense..so much easier. And a few other minor changes. I will continue the story...one way or another.
Laz