Still A Virgin?!

At Thirty She Had It All... Intact Von:
User: Kobby Ben
Still A Virgin?!
At thirty, the first things on your mind should be a husband, kids and a job that pays.
For Danielle Longhorne, she wasn't close to all the above, because to get all that, she needed to be deflowered. Who says a virgin can have kids, a husband, and a job that pays? Let's take out kids off the picture, Danielle recently works for the magazine of her dreams, NEWCHIC, as an erotic columnist-the job that pays. She was in a two-year relationship with a famous, hot. a-list Hollywood director who ALMOST got married to her-the husband(that pays)... then she meets Mark who comes along with his rock abs of steel and irritating cockiness Danielle can't help but fall. In the world of Fashion, magazine and love, there should be a place for the thirty-year old virgin and she can't wait for it to come knocking. Don't miss out on Kobby Ben's first book of the new-hit series, NewChic series about the funny lives of columnists, editors and free-lancers to the fictional COSMO look-alike magazine, NewChic.

Beiträge und Kommentare
Wichtiger Beitrag
Janette

Love it! hilarious cant wait for future updates. Great job so far so good.

1 Kommentar
Dieser Kommentar wurde gelöscht.
Wichtiger Beitrag
O_O

This is really awesome. You're a great writer. :)

1 Kommentar
Kobby Ben

hope you keep reading. Thanks.

Wichtiger Beitrag
Chris-Jean

I love the plot & main framework of this story. With a quick edit you could make this story positively glow.

3 Kommentare
Kobby Ben

Thanks for the feedback. Are there any editing tricks I could steal from you? or what do you think my problems are?

Chris-Jean

There are a few pesky typos rearing their heads, but don't worry many writers, including myself, get them. Just 'stomp on them'.

Please, remember writing is very subjective & depends on the individuals tastes & morals. So please, feel free to accept or ignore my tips.

I would... mehr anzeigen

Kobby Ben

ThankS much! I needed a great take on it. An analytic one. I will sure take your advise. If you come across anything that doesn't sit well with you lemmie know since I am working so hard on it to feel publishing material.

Wichtiger Beitrag
Gelöschter User

i like still a virgin, great storyling and amazing plot :)

2 Kommentare
Kobby Ben

aww, thanks. I am sure it loves you too.

Gelöschter User

:P i hope so :) may i send a friend request now? 8-) :P

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