BookRix

A beautifully written, heartrending story.

A wonderfully told story about something we all face eventually. The writing is smooth and effortless. Beautiful and poignant.

I read this story a while back, but had forgotten if had commented or not, but i LOVED this book.

There is so much I could say about this story, but I don’t want to devalue it with my words. Wonderfully written, honest and emotional representation of grief, and an all around heartwarming and minding enriching reading experience.

Check me out at The Swap Shop- Our Place.

Loved this story. It reminded me a bit of 'The Cabin'.

I think you have told it very well, although I would have liked the finding of the shawl to be a bit more poignantly told. 'never know where its been', was a rough end to a nicely flowing romantic life-after-death story.

And the sudden appearance of the boy was a jolt, Perhaps use two hikers (lovers) who come across it and the woman takes the shawl home with her because it is so beautiful. Gives the reader an impression of everlasting life.

I was struck by the passage at the start of page 13. I loved how you wrote that, because it took Justin away from the main scene and gave us a taste of how he felt about the forest. There was one bit about the squirrels that needs tidying up
"...squirrels with fluffy tales that frequented the forest." It reads like the 'tails' frequented the forest. Just one of this silly misworded sentences we all make.

And at the intro of the story you wrote,
'picturesque mountain cabin harbored nostalgic memories'. I felt it needed a comma but of course there isn't a correct place for one. It's one of those passages that you read and when you get to the last word, you feel as if you have to go back and read it again to understand it. So while it's correctly formatted, you don't want your reader doing that in the first paragraph. I would suggest you change it to something like '...picturesque mountain cabin, which harbored many nostalgic memories' or something to that effect.

Overall, a lovely story, which you would do well to enter somewhere. I think you could gain a prize somewhere with this one.

Well done
Wendy xx

I just do not know how wonderful gently told stories surface, but I am so sincerely glad that I found this one.

i like the vizalation

I like your style writing. Sad but nicely done.

How DO you do it, John? This is incredible. I loved every word of it.

One small typo that I noticed- "saw" on page 11 should be "seeing".

Other than that... breathtaking. :)

I couldn't put this down. It was a wonderful read, so much pain in love expressed in this short that I found myself crying. I love stories like this, and for me you told a story that's worth passing alone.