BookRix

Very nice.

DOES YOUR STORY HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH ALIENS AND UFO'S AT ALL ? BECAUSE ALL I SEE IS A COMPUTER(EVIDENTLY AN AGING ONE AT THAT ...LOL) TRANSPORTING THE LEAD CHARACTER MIA TO A CYBER SPACE
LOCATION (WHICH YOUR LEAD IN INTRODUCTION LEADS ONE TO BELIEVE SHE'S TRAPPED IN AT PRESENT.
JUST CURIOUS AS TO THE USE OF THE UFO COVER IF STORY HAS NO BEARING ON THE COVER. OTHER THAN THAT THE STORY HAS PROMISE . WOULD LIKE YOU TO RETURN THE FAVOUR AND VIEW MY STORY "ALLIE'S RETURN"
WHICH IS A SPIN OFF OF STEVEN SPIELBERGS MINI TV SERIES CALLED "TAKEN"

i dont get it

too short not real clear

short

I am new to this site and don't yet know the right protocol. So please excuse if I handle this wrong. I found the story truncated. It felt incomplete, the scenes were too short and not well described. I can see the potential with a rewrite, especially with more emphasis on the character and setting up the plot.
Anyway, this is just my opinion.

I am new to this site and don't yet know the right protocol. So please excuse if I handle this wrong. I found the story truncated. It felt incomplete, the scenes were too short and not well described. I can see the potential with a rewrite, especially with more emphasis on the character and setting up the plot.
Anyway, this is just my opinion.

I am new to this site and don't yet know the right protocol. So please excuse if I handle this wrong. I found the story truncated. It felt incomplete, the scenes were too short and not well described. I can see the potential with a rewrite, especially with more emphasis on the character and setting up the plot.
Anyway, this is just my opinion.

I liked the details of the people and objects in this short story

great book well writen