The Day Our Hearts Stood Still

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The Day Our Hearts Stood Still
How our family felt when a son had to have open heart surgery to correct a congenital aortic valvular stenosis.

Beiträge und Kommentare
Wichtiger Beitrag
rebekahjennings

Hi Emery,

I liked your story. It flowed well, you kept only the important words. I didn't really pick up any errors, so my hat off to you. It doesn't seem to matter how many times I edit my work, there's still something there to edit further. Lol...

Well done. You have my vote.

Bek :)

4 Kommentare
elcampbell

Hi Rebecca,

The best writing is done during revision. I'd suggest you put your pieces aside for a few weeks and then look at them again with new eyes. Errors and awkward phrasings etc can be more easily spotted this way. Also anomalies can be much more easily picked up from work... mehr anzeigen

elcampbell

P.S. If you want to email your story to me I can make the corrections right on the text.

ELC
elcampbell08@comcast.net

elcampbell

Rebekah,

I tried sending you an email with my comments on your fire story to andybeki@yahoo.com but the message did not go through. Do I have your address wrong? Pls advise.

Emery
elcampbell08@comcast.net

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Wichtiger Beitrag
joeparente

You have hit a nerve with this story of the heart valve. I am glad that you asked me to read it. (you promoted it by telling me about it). I have a somewhat similar problem with a leaking valve. It is not bad enough to operate but it does give me an irregular heart beat. I presently have a St. Jude pace/ defib installed that helps things. reading your story makes me feel that I am not alone in this battle./you have a star and... mehr anzeigen

1 Kommentar
elcampbell

Thanks, Joe, for the kind words and for your vote. I have an atrial fibrillation problem myself, but it is well controled by a med that my doc prescribed some years ago.

I'm afraid I cannot altogether agree with your comments about vote-getting skill's relevance to determining... mehr anzeigen

Wichtiger Beitrag
mirandabm

I read this with bated breath, hoping that all would be well. I identify so much with your fear. In fact, if you read my story The First Sneeze, I think you'll recognize the emotions! Good writing.

Wichtiger Beitrag
librarian

Thank you for participating in our short
story writing contest "Family Stories".

The Librarian

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