BookRix

Nicely written it made me feel as if to be there. A short story yes but a glimpse from what could have been an ordinary day in Indunesia. Well done
Sincerely,
jewelsofjapan

Interesting. Very short - but well-written. I liked it. Nice use of language. I was taken aback by the colloquial "score a haircut" phrase, but I dislike modern expressions anyway, especially in books and stories, unless it's absolutely necessary. But it's not completely out of place here. Again, well-done. Thank you!

-

-

-

-

-

...this was so entertaining--I wish there were more.
It takes a special skill to write a true 'short' story though, and have it offer as much (if not more)reading entertainment than the lengthier ones.
Good luck in the contest.

You got all the i's dotted and t's crossed from me.. (star/vote/5's :). Much deserved.

Thank you for participating in our short
story writing contest "Travel Stories".

______
BookRix - your place to read, write and
network free literature on the internet...

...if only you charged admission..then you'd have a profit!! Excellent entry in the travelogue of a World traveler...thanks for sharing!