BookRix

Review - Everyone has a story. Either they have lived one, learned one, or imagined one. It is not, in the beginning, how well you write, but that you desire to write. Just as a child, you crawled, then desired to walk, and had to practice to do it.

You started off well. You built a scene, had suspense, created questions. This is good. Halfway on the second page, when she finds the knight, you lost Point of View and it was a little confusing.

From there you added a lot of story quickly, as if trying to capture the idea. Now the real work begins. Take this story and polish it. Fill in the cracks. Edit it. Tell more of it. This could be a good short story.

I hear your 'voice', your desire to write, now do it to the best of your ability. If you re-work this story I would like to read it again. I'd be happy to give you suggestions via emails. This is to public of a forum to discuss what needs to be done next.

You took a big step, a scary one, but you tried. For that I admire you greatly. Good job. Robynn

come to our house me and ronnea want you to

your a stupid bitch thats all i gotta say

this book sucks and i dont think you should write any more so thats all i gotta say and you should take my advice

Good book i rlly enjoyed it