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Wichtiger Beitrag
Hey, I finished revising, and, trust me, you will not be disappointed with the quality of my work. I fixed the weird paragraph-in-the-middle-of-a-sentence thing, made paragraphs (what's up with you not paragraphing things?) added punctuation, fixed spelling errors, capitalized the beginnings of sentences, and made the story a lot more logical. I emailed it back, so tell me when you've updated!
~H
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